What is the American dream? To most, that answer comes pretty naturally; a house, a car, 2.5 kids and making sure to keep up with "the Joneses". But to others like myself, it is a lost concept.
I'm in my early 40's and I don't have a house, never even owned my own car and the only thing I seem to be fulfilling is the 2 kids and a husband. I definitely don't have a normal job and I don't fit into the stay-at-home mom crowd. I have never turned to my husband expecting him to go work at a job he hates. He instead has always worked from home; another lost concept until recently.
I represent a different generation; a generation who's out of the box thinking can seem way too unconventional to some and downright scary or crazy to others. I bucked the system and instead of settling down, I decided to travel this world as a nomad. Most understand this type of lifestyle for the twenty-something on a soul-searching mission to find themselves or on a gap year, but it’s a difficult thing to grasp when talking about a 30-something mother of two. While I don’t chase the American dream, as time and countries pass by, I am more than ever aware that I am still very quintessentially American. I love America and no matter where I travel this great country of ours will always be home.
So why does the quintessential American Dream not only elude me, but confuse me as well? Is it flawed or am I? I love buying new products and I get a thrill from the latest and greatest gadgets. Even I can even get sucked into the black hole that is Target’s home department, but when all is said and done possessions only bring our family brief happiness. That momentary happiness eventually turns into hate of clutter, broken expensive items, and deep regret.
That eventual regret didn’t stop me though from trying to achieve the perfect home. For me, I wanted to be the all-American fun mom. The one that needlessly buys her kids five bounce houses to live vicariously through them and somehow make her own childhood dreams come true.
But not after too long, I started to get restless and felt empty. I realized the world and not just my own city was calling. It was asking me “Why are you standing still?” “Why are you settling, just because this is what everyone says is normal? “ I honestly didn’t know the answer to those questions, was it something prewired? Was the American Dream fed to me as a child, making it the obvious choice as an adult? I’m still not sure, but I knew something needed to change. I didn’t need the white picket fence to feel fulfilled and even more I didn’t need it to have the approval of others.
So am I truly American if I say “Down with the dream”? I think yes. I think yes, because the American dream was never meant to be the things you buy or how nice your house is. The American dream is FREEDOM. Freedom to do any damn thing you want. Freedom to leave this country, see the great big world, seek out new cultures and people and come back to love America even more. To love baseball, hot dogs, dishwashers, and a garbage disposal in every home (these are not worldwide).
So I will unconventionally take my kids out of “suburbia” pack up what’s really needed into four suitcases and show them that the American Dream is anything you want it to be. It’s the freedom to be weird, to be “out of the norm”. It’s freedom for you to be you and not your neighbor.
Life is too short to let others dictate what our American dream should be.
